Angels

I just had my 8th surgery today for endometriosis and some other health issues. It is my 11th one overall. I have so much on my heart and mind that I want to share.

But first things first, thanks everyone who took the time to read my story featured on Ashlee's Blog (www.themomentswestand.com) Welcome to my blog that is under development. I really will try to write more as I have set a goal to finish the book I am writing by June.

I had a powerful experience today. I prayed that the Lord would send His angels that weren't busy doing other things to come and surround me at the hospital from the moment I walked in until this healing process is done. I felt them in such a strong way. I won't say it's not hard when they ask from a family emergency contact and I couldn't write down my mom or grandma. But I know with ALL of my heart that the Lord always compensates us for what we are lacking.

This has always been one of my favorite quotes: "The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude." ~ Joseph B. Wirthlin

This quote gives me hope. I physically felt their presence with me today even though they died years ago. I also specifically asked if at all possible that my Aunt Dorothy and Great Grandma could be there too. These remarkable women died before my birth but they had intense adversity in their lives and dealt with is so gracefully, I am nowhere near as graceful. I believe in inherited the red hair I was born with and the feisty spirit to go along with it from my great grandma. 

I know that angels, seen and unseen, are around us. The seen ones would have to be my Minnesota family that includes my amazing aunt too who just beat breast cancer and is an amazing example to me of a fighter. 

I am so grateful for my family and friends who truly are angels on earth. I think often times we thin we have to do something big to make a difference in someone's life. This is simply not true. I am grateful for my sweet cousin that texted me as I was going into surgery. I am sure to her it just seemed like a little text but it meant the world to me that she was thinking and praying for me as I went into surgery. There has been such an out pour of love and I am so very grateful.

I have had friends this week that have said I have made vulnerability look easy. Oh that is so far from the truth. Growing up I had to just put on a happy face and power through anything and everything. Somewhere along my childhood I stopped asking for help because I knew I wouldn't get it. I am just learning that it's okay to feel all the array of emotions and that it is part of our human experience.

I've also learned that the Lord wants us to be real with Him. I always say it's okay to be angry just don't set up camp there and learn to express it in a healthy way. I know He is there and willing to give us the approval we crave. No human can do that. The greatest people in the history of the world were not those who were loved by everyone. I struggle with being real 100% of the time because sometimes that can cause others to disapprove. Really, in the end, all the approval we need is the Lord's. In fact, when we are doing His work not everyone will like us and that can be a very good sign. Some of the greatest people in history were hated.

I hope today you are surrounded by seen and unseen angels. You can pray and ask the Lord to send angels particularly when you are feeling vulnerable or going through something stressful at the time. I believe we can pray and ask them to go before us and prepare the hearts of others. I believe they can open doors that no man on this earth can close. Angels are among us, be one because the world needs YOUR unique light.